# Tell me about a conflict at work: how to answer, with examples

Pick a disagreement with a peer about work, not personalities, and tell it in STAR: what the conflict was, how you raised it privately and calmly, how you found a solution together, and how the working relationship ended up. The result should show both the problem solved and the relationship kept.

By the Speaking Coach team at Sodhera Intelligence. Updated 2026-10-22. Source: https://www.orecci.com/speaking-coach/interview-questions/tell-me-about-a-time-you-had-a-conflict/

## What the interviewer is listening for

Conflict happens in every workplace. The interviewer isn't checking whether you've had conflict; they're checking how you behave in it. They want to hear that you:

- Raised the issue directly, rather than complaining to others.
- Stayed calm and kept it about the work.
- Listened to the other person's side.
- Found a solution, not just a winner.
- Still work well with that person afterwards.

That last point is what separates good answers from average ones. Solving the problem is half the result; keeping the relationship is the other half.

## Pick the right conflict

| Good picks | Risky picks |
| --- | --- |
| Disagreement over how to do a task or split work | Personal dislike or personality clashes |
| Two teams with competing priorities | Anything involving harassment or discrimination |
| A colleague missing handovers that affected your work | A conflict that ended with someone disciplined or fired |
| Different views on a design, plan or schedule | A conflict you lost your temper in, unless the lesson is strong |
| Feedback that one of you took badly, then sorted out | A conflict still going on |

Use a peer if you can. Conflicts with a manager are a separate question; see [disagreeing with your boss](/speaking-coach/interview-questions/tell-me-about-a-time-you-disagreed-with-your-manager/).

## The steps interviewers want to hear

When you tell the action part, include as many of these as are true:

1. **You noticed and acted early,** before it grew.
2. **You spoke to them privately,** in person or on a call, not in a group email.
3. **You asked for their view first** and listened.
4. **You found the shared goal.** Usually you both want the same outcome.
5. **You agreed a specific next step** together.
6. **You followed up** to check it was working.

## Neutral language helps

How you describe the other person matters as much as what happened.

| Sounds like blame | Sounds fair |
| --- | --- |
| "She was impossible to work with." | "We had very different ideas about the timeline." |
| "He never did his part." | "His handovers were often incomplete, which left gaps for my shift." |
| "They were being difficult." | "They were under pressure from their own manager." |
| "I proved I was right." | "We ended up with a plan that used both our ideas." |

## Example answers

Made-up examples to show the structure. Use your own story.

### Project coordinator: competing deadlines

> **Situation:** "I was coordinating a product launch, and the design lead and I clashed over the schedule. She wanted another two weeks for the packaging; I had a retailer deadline we couldn't move."
>
> **Task:** "It was my job to get everything ready for the retailer date without losing the design quality."
>
> **Action:** "Rather than argue in the team meeting, I asked her for half an hour one-to-one. I asked what the extra time was for, and it turned out most of it was waiting for printed proofs. We agreed to approve digital proofs for the first run and use printed proofs for the second. I also took one of her approval steps off her plate."
>
> **Result:** "We hit the retailer date, and the packaging passed on the first print. She asked me to coordinate her next project too, which told me the relationship was in good shape."

### Nurse: handovers between shifts

> "On my ward, the night nurse's handover notes for my patients were often missing key information, like when pain medication was last given. I was frustrated, but instead of mentioning it to others, I asked her if we could talk at the end of her shift. I explained the problem with one specific example and asked how her nights were going. She told me she was usually covering extra patients and running out of time. We agreed a short checklist for the handover's must-haves, and I suggested it to our ward manager for everyone. Handovers improved, and she and I now cover for each other when one of us is stuck."

### Software developer: code review disagreement

> "A colleague and I disagreed about how to structure a new feature, and our code review comments were getting longer and sharper. I suggested we stop commenting and talk it through on a call instead. We each explained what we were worried about: I was worried about performance, he was worried about how hard it would be to change later. We built a quick test of both approaches, and his was fine on performance, so we went with it. I told him so in the review thread, publicly. We've paired on several features since."

## If you genuinely can't think of a conflict

Don't say "I've never had a conflict." Think smaller: a disagreement about how to split work, a scheduling clash, a different opinion in a meeting. These count. If you're early in your career, a group project disagreement works, told with the same steps.

## Mistakes to avoid

| Mistake | Why it hurts | Try instead |
| --- | --- | --- |
| Making the other person the villain | Makes the interviewer wonder about your side | Describe their position fairly |
| Escalating to a manager first | Suggests you avoid hard conversations | Show you tried to solve it directly first |
| "I just let it go." | No resolution, and the issue may still be there | Show a specific step you took |
| No word on the relationship | Half the result is missing | Say how you work together now |
| A story where you were plainly in the wrong and didn't change | No lesson | Pick one where your behaviour helped |

## How to practise it

Tell your story out loud and listen to how you describe the other person. If your tone sharpens, the interviewer will hear it. Then practise the follow-ups: "What would you do if they hadn't agreed?" and "What did you learn?" Speaking Coach has a "Disagree in a meeting" scene that's useful for practising the calm, direct tone these stories need, and after the session it shows tips that quote what you actually said.

## Questions people ask

### What's a good example of a conflict at work?

A disagreement with a colleague about how to do a task, share work or meet a deadline, which you resolved by talking privately and agreeing a solution. Avoid personal or serious misconduct issues.

### Can I talk about a conflict with my manager?

You can, but it's a separate question in many interviews. For "a conflict at work", a peer conflict is usually the safest and clearest story.

### What if the conflict wasn't fully resolved?

Choose a different one if you can. If not, explain what you did, what improved, and what you'd do differently.

### How long should the answer be?

About 90 seconds to two minutes, with most of the time on the action and the result.

### Should I use STAR for this question?

Yes. The [STAR method](/speaking-coach/guides/star-method/) keeps the story short, and the result part is where you show both the outcome and the relationship.

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