# What to Say in a Father of the Groom Speech (With Examples)

The father of the groom usually speaks as host of the rehearsal dinner: welcome the guests, thank those who travelled, tell one short story about your son, welcome his partner and their family, and raise a toast. Keep it to two to four minutes; the reception belongs to the other speeches.

By the Speaking Coach team at Sodhera Intelligence. Updated 2026-10-22. Source: https://www.orecci.com/speaking-coach/speeches/father-of-the-groom-speech/

## Where the father of the groom fits

In many weddings, the father of the bride speaks at the reception and the groom's family hosts the rehearsal dinner the night before. That makes the rehearsal dinner the natural place for the father of the groom. Some couples also invite him to speak at the reception, so ask early which they'd like.

| Setting | Your role | What to emphasise | Length |
| --- | --- | --- | --- |
| Rehearsal dinner, as host | Opening speaker; sets the tone for the night | Welcome, thanks, your son, the new family | 3 to 4 minutes |
| Rehearsal dinner, not hosting | One of several toasts | One story and a toast | 2 minutes |
| Reception | One of the parent speeches | Shorter, more polished, inclusive of all guests | 2 to 3 minutes |

## The host's structure

1. **Welcome (20 seconds).** Who you are, glad they're here. If you're sharing the hosting with your partner or co-parent, name them.
2. **Thanks (20 seconds).** People who travelled, the other family, anyone who helped plan. In groups, not a list.
3. **Your son (60 to 90 seconds).** One story. Fathers often reach for a list of achievements; a single moment that shows character is far better.
4. **His partner and their family (30 to 45 seconds).** What you've seen since they met, and a warm welcome by name.
5. **Housekeeping, if needed (10 seconds).** "The buses leave at 3 tomorrow." One line.
6. **The toast (10 seconds).**
7. **Open the floor, if planned.** "Anyone who'd like to say a few words, now's your chance." Then sit down.

At about three minutes, that's 350 to 450 words. The [speech length calculator](/speaking-coach/tools/speech-length-calculator/) converts your draft into minutes.

## Example: father of the groom hosting the rehearsal dinner (about 3 minutes)

This is a made-up example. Use your own family's stories.

> "Good evening, everyone. I'm David, Josh's dad. Karen and I are delighted you're all here.
>
> I know some of you have come a long way. Inês's grandparents flew in from Lisbon this morning, and Josh's old college roommate drove fourteen hours, which is longer than he ever spent in the library. Thank you.
>
> When Josh was fifteen, he worked his first summer job at a hardware store. On his second day, a man came in looking for one specific washer for a forty-year-old tap. They didn't stock it. Josh spent his lunch break phoning three other stores until he found one. He didn't get paid for that hour. When I asked him why he bothered, he said, 'Because he really needed it.' That's still Josh. He's the one who makes the extra call.
>
> Inês, I've watched him make a lot of extra calls for you. And I've watched you make them right back. When I had my knee operation last spring, it was you who drove over with soup, twice. I knew then that Josh had found someone who looks after people the way he does.
>
> To Inês's parents, Ana and Rui: thank you for raising such a wonderful daughter, and for being so generous to us this past year. From tomorrow, we're one family. I couldn't be happier about that.
>
> The ceremony starts at four, so please, have a good night, but not too good.
>
> Everyone, please stand and raise your glass: to Josh and Inês."

## Short version for a reception toast (about 1 minute)

> "I'm David, Josh's father. I'll be brief, because the best man has warned me he's been practising for months. Josh, you've always been the one who makes the extra call. Inês, you make it right back. Karen and I couldn't be prouder or happier. Please raise your glasses: to Josh and Inês."

## Lines for the hard parts

These are example lines to adapt.

**Divorced or blended family:** "Josh is lucky to have had two homes full of people who love him, and many of them are here tonight." Mention co-parents and step-parents by name, warmly, once.

**A parent or grandparent who has died:** "Josh's grandmother taught him to fish and to keep his promises. She would have loved tonight." One line, then move on.

**If you're not a natural speaker:** "Anyone who knows me knows I'm a man of few words, so I've written them down." Then read, slowly. It's fine.

## Father of the groom vs father of the bride

The father of the bride often gives the biggest parent speech at the reception. The father of the groom's speech is usually shorter, happens the night before, and has more hosting duties: welcoming, thanking, managing the open floor. If you're speaking at both events, use different stories. For the bride's side, see the [father of the bride speech](/speaking-coach/speeches/father-of-the-bride-speech/).

## Mistakes to avoid

| Mistake | Why it hurts | Instead |
| --- | --- | --- |
| Listing his achievements | Sounds like a reference letter | One story that shows who he is |
| Stories about his past girlfriends or boyfriends | Hurtful, and the partner's family is listening | Childhood and work stories only |
| Too much about the cost or planning | Sounds like a complaint | Thanks, not logistics |
| Forgetting to welcome the other family | It's the line they're waiting for | Say their names and something specific |
| Letting the open floor run for an hour | People get restless; the couple needs an early night | Set a limit and close it gently |

## Delivering it

- **Speak early in the evening**, once people have a drink but before dessert.
- **Stand where everyone can see you** and wait for quiet before you start.
- **Say it out loud a few times.** Most people speed up during the story. To check, use the [pace checker](/speaking-coach/tools/pace-checker/); a relaxed toast sits around 120 to 150 words a minute.

You can also rehearse with Speaking Coach, which plays a listening audience and shows your pace and filler words afterwards.

## Questions people ask

### Does the father of the groom give a speech?

Often, especially as host of the rehearsal dinner. At the reception it's optional; ask the couple.

### What does the father of the groom say at the rehearsal dinner?

Welcome the guests, thank people who travelled and helped, tell one story about your son, welcome his partner and their family by name, and raise a toast.

### How long should the father of the groom speak?

Three to four minutes as host of the rehearsal dinner, one to three minutes at the reception.

### Should the father of the groom thank the bride's parents?

Yes. Thank them for raising their child and welcome them into your family, by name.

### Can the groom's parents give a joint speech?

Yes. One can welcome the guests and tell a story; the other can welcome the new family and give the toast. See the [mother of the groom speech](/speaking-coach/speeches/mother-of-the-groom-speech/) for her part.

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