What do you say when you walk up to someone at a networking event?

Introduce yourself and ask about the event: "Hi, I'm Tom. What brought you to this one?" It's simple, and gives them an easy first answer.

How long should a networking conversation last?

Usually five to ten minutes. Long enough to learn something about each other, short enough that you both meet other people.

How do I network if I don't have a job right now?

Say so briefly and point forward: "I'm between roles. I was in marketing for eight years and I'm looking at sustainability now." People often want to help when they know what you're looking for.

Should I bring business cards?

Bring a few if your industry still uses them. Many people now connect on LinkedIn or swap numbers instead. What matters is the follow-up.

How do I follow up after a networking event?

Send a short message within a couple of days that mentions what you talked about and anything you promised to send.

How to Network at an Event When You Hate Networking

Change the goal

Many people hate networking because it feels like selling yourself to a room. A smaller, clearer goal helps:

Have three real conversations. Not twenty business cards. Three people you actually talked to for five minutes or more.
Learn one useful thing. A company that's hiring, a tool, an event worth going to.
Leave when you've done that. You don't have to stay to the end.

That turns a vague, draining evening into something you can finish.

Before you go: prepare three things

Your one-sentence answer to "What do you do?" (see below).
Two questions for other people, such as "What brought you to this one?" and "What are you working on at the moment?"
Your exit line, so you never feel trapped.

Say them out loud a few times on the way. Lines you've only thought about tend to come out jumbled the first time you say them to a stranger.

Who to approach first

Arrive in the first 15 to 20 minutes. Rooms are quieter, people are still arriving alone, and nobody is locked into a group yet.

Who	Why	Opening line
Someone standing alone	They're often relieved to be approached	"Hi, I'm Tom. Mind if I join you? I don't know anyone here yet."
People at the food or drinks table	Shared, low-pressure moment	"Have you tried these? I can't tell what's in them."
A pair standing at an angle, open to the room	They've left space for a third person	"Mind if I join? You two look like you know how these work."
The organiser or host	Their job is to connect people	"Is there anyone here you think I should meet? I work in logistics."
A tight, closed circle	Hardest to join	Wait, or find someone at its edge

For joining a group that's already talking, see how to join a group conversation. The short version: stand at the edge, listen, nod, and wait for a natural pause or for someone to turn to you.

Opening lines that don't sound like networking

The event is your easiest topic. Everyone there has it in common.

"What brought you to this one?" "Have you been to one of these before? Is it always this busy?" "Did you catch the talk earlier? I missed the start." "I'm Ana, I'm new to the area. How long have you been coming to these?"

Save "So, what do you do?" for a minute or two in. It lands better once you've already exchanged a few friendly lines.

Talking about your work

When someone asks what you do, the worst answers are a job title alone ("I'm an analyst") or a long CV. Aim for one sentence that explains the work plus one detail they can ask about.

Examples:

"I'm a nurse on a children's ward, and lately I've been training the new staff on night shifts." "I run payroll for a group of restaurants, which is mostly solving problems at 6 a.m." "I'm between jobs at the moment. I was in marketing for eight years and I'm looking at roles in sustainability."

The detail ("at 6 a.m.", "sustainability") gives them a natural question to ask. Then turn it around: "What about you?" For more, see how to answer 'What do you do?' and the longer elevator pitch for when someone asks for more detail.

Keep it a conversation, not a pitch

Networking goes best when you're curious about them. Good follow-up questions:

"How did you get into that?"
"What's the hardest part of it right now?"
"What are you working on that you're excited about?"
"Who else here should I talk to?"

If you can help them with something small (an introduction, an article, a name), offer it. That's what people remember.

Exchanging contact details

Only swap details when there's a reason to follow up. It feels natural when it's tied to something you discussed:

"I'd love to send you that article about route planning. What's the best way to reach you?" "Are you on LinkedIn? I'll connect so I can let you know when we're hiring." "Can I introduce you to my colleague by email? She's working on the same problem."

Then follow up within a couple of days, and mention what you talked about: "Great to meet you at the logistics meetup on Tuesday. Here's that article on route planning I mentioned."

How to leave a conversation

Every networking conversation should end, usually after five to ten minutes. A clean exit lets both of you meet other people.

"It's been great talking to you. I'm going to grab a drink and say hi to a couple more people. Enjoy the rest of the evening." "I don't want to keep you all night. Let's stay in touch." "Have you met Raj? He works in the same area. Raj, this is Mei."

The last one, introducing them to someone, is the most generous exit. More lines in how to end a conversation politely.

If you're an introvert

Take short breaks. Step out for five minutes between conversations.
Stand somewhere with flow, like near the drinks, so people come to you.
Go with one goal and leave when it's done.

Small talk for introverts has more ways to save energy. If you'd like to rehearse first, Speaking Coach has a Work the room scene where an AI partner plays someone you meet at an event and responds to what you actually say.