What do you talk about at a 10-year reunion?

Shared memories, where people live now, what they do for fun, and what surprised them since school. Jobs come up, but try to go beyond the title.

How do I handle feeling like I haven't achieved enough?

Remember most people feel some version of this. Talk about what you enjoy now, not your rank, and ask about them. Curiosity takes the pressure off.

What if I don't remember someone?

Be honest and light: "Remind me of your name? It's been too long." Most people are relieved you asked.

Is it okay to go to a reunion alone?

Yes. Many people do. Old teachers, the building and shared memories make starting conversations easier than at most events.

How do I avoid talking about my divorce or job loss?

Give one calm sentence, such as "It's been a big year, but I'm doing okay", and ask them a question to move on.

What to Talk About at a School or College Reunion (Examples)

The odd thing about reunions

A reunion is small talk with people who knew you before you were who you are now. That's what makes it strange. You might feel 16 again the moment you walk in, or feel you have to prove how far you've come. Most people feel some version of this, so you're in good company.

The good news is that you have something rare: shared history. You don't have to find common ground. You already have it.

Openers that work

Situation	What to say
You were close once	"It's so good to see you. I was hoping you'd come."
You barely knew them	"I don't think we ever really talked properly. I'm Kim, I was in the chemistry set."
You remember a moment	"I still think about the time you set fire to the lab bench."
You can't remember their name	"Remind me of your name? Fifteen years has scrambled my brain." See forgot someone's name
They look nervous too	"Is it just me, or is this a bit surreal?"
By the old photos or yearbook	"Look at this haircut. What was I thinking?"

A shared memory is the warmest opener, as long as it's kind. Leave out the embarrassing ones unless you know they'll laugh.

Catching up beyond the job title

The first question at most reunions is "So what are you doing now?" It's fine, but if every chat stays on job titles, the evening turns into a round of comparing CVs. Have a few questions ready that open up the rest of life:

"Where are you living these days? How did you end up there?"
"What's taking up most of your time at the moment?"
"What would 18-year-old you be most surprised by?"
"Who from back then are you still in touch with?"
"What's something you're into now that you'd never have guessed?"
"Do you ever come back here? What's changed most?"

"What would 18-year-old you be surprised by?" is especially good at reunions. It invites a story, it's fun, and the answer is rarely about money or status.

When it's your turn, answer with a hook rather than a résumé. "I'm a pharmacist in Bristol, and I've somehow ended up coaching my son's under-9s football team" gives them two things to ask about.

Handling comparisons and awkward questions

Reunions bring out questions that can sting: about marriage, children, jobs, weight, money, or who did "better". Some are nosy, most are just clumsy. A short, relaxed answer and a turn back to them handles almost all of them.

They ask	You might say
"Are you married? Kids?"	"Not married, no kids. Lots of nieces and nephews, though. How about you?"
"Still working at the same place?"	"Yep, eleven years now. I like it more than I expected. Where are you?"
"Didn't you want to be a doctor?"	"I did! Life had other plans. I ended up in teaching and I love it."
"You look so different!"	"Fifteen years will do that. You look great."
"What happened with you and Chris?"	"Oh, ancient history. Anyway, tell me about you."
Someone brags at length	"That sounds like a lot of work. What do you do to switch off?"

The pattern: one honest sentence, no apology, then a question back. If you need to steer further away, the changing the subject guide has bridging lines.

If you're between jobs, going through a divorce, or something else hard, you don't owe anyone details. "It's been a big year. I'm doing okay" is honest and closes the topic gently.

Moving around the room

A reunion is a big room of people you half-know. A few tips:

Arrive with a short list of three or four people you'd like to see. Find them first.
Keep most chats to five or ten minutes. Everyone wants to see lots of people.
Join groups easily. "Mind if I join? I heard the word 'Mr Patel' and had to come over." Old teachers are an excellent group topic.
Exit warmly: "I'm going to say hi to a few more people, but I really want to hear more about the move. Can I find you later?"

Old teachers, school trips, the canteen food, and what's happened to the building are all reliable group topics. Everyone has a story.

Reconnecting for real

The evening goes fast, and "We should keep in touch!" rarely leads anywhere. If you click with someone, make it concrete before you leave:

"I'm in London most weekends. Let's actually get lunch. Can I take your number?"

"You should come to the five-a-side thing some of us still do. I'll message you the details."

Then message within a few days, mentioning something from your chat. The making friends as an adult guide covers how to turn that into a regular thing.

Mistakes to avoid

Mistake	Why it hurts	Try instead
Leading with achievements	Feels like competing	Lead with curiosity about them
Bringing up old embarrassments	They may still sting	Share kind memories only
Staying with your old group all night	You miss the people you came to see	Plan to talk to three new people
Drinking to calm nerves	Makes it easier to overshare	Pace yourself, especially early on
Vague "let's keep in touch"	Rarely happens	Swap numbers and suggest one plan

Practise your catch-up

If you're nervous, rehearse your own short update and one or two questions out loud beforehand. The Speaking Coach app has a "Meet someone new" scene, or you can describe the reunion and the partner plays an old classmate who asks about your life, including the awkward questions, so your answers come out calm on the night.