Does the mother of the groom give a speech?

She can, but it isn't required. Many speak at the rehearsal dinner, especially when the groom's family hosts it. Some give a reception speech if the couple asks.

How long should a mother of the groom speech be?

Two to four minutes. If both of the groom's parents speak, keep each part to about two minutes.

What does the mother of the groom say to the bride?

Say what you've noticed about her, what she brings out in your son, and that she's welcome in your family. A specific moment makes it real.

Should the mother of the groom mention the bride's family?

Yes. Welcoming them by name is one of the most important lines in the speech.

Can the mother and father of the groom give a joint speech?

Yes. Agree on who says what. One can tell a story about your son; the other can welcome the new family and give the toast.

What to Say in a Mother of the Groom Speech (With Examples)

When the mother of the groom speaks

There's no fixed slot. The most common options:

Where	Why it works	Length
Rehearsal dinner, as host or co-host	Smaller room, family and close friends, more personal	3 to 4 minutes
Rehearsal dinner, after the father of the groom	Shares the hosting; you take the welcome to the new family	2 to 3 minutes
Reception, as one of the parent speeches	When the couple wants both sets of parents to speak	2 to 3 minutes
Joint speech with the groom's father	Each takes a part, no overlap	3 to 4 minutes in total

Ask the couple which they prefer, and find out who else is speaking so you don't tell the same story as the best man.

What the speech should cover

Welcome and thanks (20 seconds). If you're hosting, welcome everyone. If not, thank the hosts.
Your son (60 to 90 seconds). One story that shows his character. Childhood stories work best here, because you're the only person who can tell them.
His partner (45 seconds). What you've seen in them, and what you've seen in your son since they met.
The other family (20 seconds). Welcome them by name. This is the line they'll remember.
A wish and a toast (20 seconds).

About three minutes, or 350 to 450 words. Check your draft with the speech length calculator.

Example speech at the rehearsal dinner (about 3 minutes)

This is a made-up example. Use your own stories and names.

"Good evening, everyone. I'm Helen, Ben's mum, and Rob and I are so happy to have you all here tonight.

When Ben was six, he decided he was going to be a vet. He brought home a pigeon with a broken wing, put it in a shoebox under his bed, and fed it bread crusts for two weeks without telling us. When we finally found it, the pigeon was fine. Ben was furious that we'd found it. He wasn't trying to be good. He just couldn't walk past something that needed help. He still can't. He's not a vet, but every friend of his in this room has had a Ben phone call at exactly the right moment.

Then he met Clara. Clara, the first time Ben brought you home, you helped me dry the dishes and asked me about my mother's recipe book. Nobody had asked about that book in twenty years. I knew then that you notice people, just like he does. And since he met you, he's calmer, he laughs more, and he finally calls me back on the same day.

To Clara's parents, Maria and Luis: we met only a year ago, and already it feels like we've known you much longer. Thank you for raising someone so kind, and for sharing her with us. Tomorrow we become one family, and I can't think of a family I'd rather join.

Please raise a glass: to Ben and Clara, and to all the people who'll need them to pick up the phone."

Example lines for different parts

These are example lines you can adapt.

A childhood memory: "He was the only child I've ever known who asked for a tie for his ninth birthday. He wore it to school every Friday for a year."

To your new daughter- or son-in-law: "Sam, I didn't gain a son-in-law today. I gained someone who argues with my son about politics so I don't have to."

To the other family: "To the Okonkwo family: you've welcomed my son as one of your own. We're doing the same for Ada, starting tonight."

If you're divorced from the groom's father: "Mark and I are both so proud of the man our son has become." One line, warmly, then move on.

If a grandparent has died: "His grandfather would have loved tonight. Ben has his laugh."

What's different about the mother of the groom

The mother of the bride and the mother of the groom often say similar things, but the groom's mother has one specific job: making the partner and their family feel fully welcome into her family. That line is often more memorable than any story. Say their names, and say something specific about them, not just "we're so happy to have you".

Mistakes to avoid

Mistake	Why it hurts	Instead
"I'm not losing a son…" clichés	Guests have heard them many times	Say what's actually true for you
Hinting he'll always be your baby	Can sound like you're not letting go	Show pride in the man he is now
Embarrassing stories about dating	Exes and old relationships don't belong here	Childhood stories, not romantic ones
Too little about the partner	The partner and their family notice	Give them nearly as much time as your son
Reading a long poem	Hard to deliver, easy to lose the room	One line of a poem at most

Delivering it

Write the welcome to the other family word for word, and the rest as bullet points.
Practise the emotional lines out loud several times. They get easier with repetition. If your voice tends to shake, see how to stop your voice shaking.
Look at your son and his partner when you speak to them, and at the room for the rest.
Hold your glass ready before the toast, not during the whole speech.

If you'd like a rehearsal with a listening audience, the "Open a presentation or toast" scene in Speaking Coach lets you deliver it out loud and then shows your pace and filler words.